I thought I knew what love was when I was with Nate, but how I feel about SJ is so much more intense, more passionate, more everything. I am absolutely and irreversibly in love with SJ. He makes me feels so great about myself and makes me want to be a better person. He doesn't want me to lose weight but he can tell I'm not happy with my body. I know I'm beautiful and I know he thinks I'm beautiful. I just feel like I could be even better for him.
I feel so lucky and so very blessed. SJ treats me better than any other male has. I would say man but SJ is the first man I have had the pleasure of being with. He is truely my best friend and my soul mate. He does whatever he can to make me happy and I do my very best to make him happy. I know things are only going to get better with us.
Little Miss Bug loves him as well. All day long she says Dada. I think she knows what it means too because SJ will say "yeah" whenever she says dada. They are the cutest together. He can always make her laugh and smile. He knows just what she needs when she's crying, just like me. He trully is her Daddy. Soon he'll be her daddy is every aspect.
I tried my hardest to have Javonte in her life, but I can only do so much. I can tell him until I'm blue in the face that she's his daughter and he needs to be a part of her life, but I can't make him realize that just because I have a boyfriend doesn't mean that he can't be part of her life. So I quit trying. I did more than my fair share of trying. He will never see her. Bottom line. Bug has her daddy and he is the best daddy in the world.
Onto a happier note:
Little Miss Bug got her ears pierced yesterday. She didn't like it at all, but she looks super cute. She's got little studs in her birthstone. Too, too cute. We decided to do both ears at the same time. I know how she gets with shots so I figured she would definitely HATE doing one ear at a time. I was a little worried that they would somehow get messed up by doing both ears at once, but they look great. Hopefully, people quit thinking she's a boy. I understand that if you see a bald head you think boy but she wears pink or purple, girly colors or ruffles and she's always got her PINK blanket, her PINK paci, and her PINK frog. People just need to open their eyes.
She LOVES watching Football with her daddy and hockey with me and her daddy. SJ is on a Football League and we went to watch him practice on Wednesday, she absolutely LOVED it. We're hoping on taking her to a Hockey game soon. Not sure how she's gonna do, but I figure if she loves watching it on tv and she's use to her daddy's random shouts of celebration/aggrevation then she should be good at an actually game. We shall see. We're hoping on going to a game for her birthday. She's definitely a lot like her daddy, I do believe she loves sports.
Of course, she is my daughter so she was utterly fascinated with Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. She loves music and loves bright colors. She sits up all on her own now. We found a Bumbo at a yardsale last month and it's a wonderful thing. She is to a point where we can't put her in it unless we are right in front of her because she is trying to push herself out of it. She's also starting to push herself out of her bouncer and her swing. Good thing her swing is also her highchair. We got her the EZBundle by fisherprice so it's a 4 in 1 thing.
I went today and got WIC. It wouldn't be so bad, but today was the first time I used WIC to get not only her formula, but also baby food and cereal. It just means that she is growing up and I don't want her too. I love her so much. SHe's growing up way to fast for my liking.
I've decided I want to try and put a playdate together with some of my friends. A lot of my friends have babies of their own so I figured it would be nice to get together and let our little pnes play. I hope I hear something back from people soon. I honestly think it's a great idea. Bug needs to be around other kids. Especially if I get a job. She'll have to go to daycare.
My babies
